Do I Need Counselling?
Firstly, in order to know if you need counselling, it’s always helpful to know what counselling actually is.
What is counselling?
- Counselling offers you a safe, confidential place to talk about your life and anything that may be confusing, painful or uncomfortable.
- It allows you to talk with someone who is trained to help you improve things.
- Counsellors don’t make decisions for you or tell you what to do, they don’t dismiss the problems you are facing, and they won’t tell you there is no reason to feel the way you do.
- Counsellors will listen, help you explore why you feel the way you do and help you think about your options for the future.
- Counsellors will help you improve your confidence, self-esteem and communication skills. You can tell your counsellor anything – they will not judge you.
Normally, you would speak to your counsellor on a weekly basis. Sessions last for about 50 minutes and you may cover a variety of topics or just one which is most bothering you that week.
All counsellors work in different ways and it’s important to find a counsellor that you feel comfortable with. You need to be able to be open and honest with them. You may sometimes feel uncomfortable with what you are discussing and your counsellor will be aware of this. Make sure you are safe in the room. If you do feel too uncomfortable, discuss this with your counsellor.
Ok, so that has covered a bit about what counselling is, but do you need counselling?
If you have depression, anxiety or mood swings which are affecting your life then you may need counselling. You may have been affected by a relationship break-up, a bereavement, bullying, a long-term illness, redundancy or any of a number of things.
Do you have thoughts that keep you awake at night? Or do you feel that you snap with people, or mistrust people because of things that have happened to you? If your mental wellbeing is affecting your life then you may need counselling to improve it.
Some people think that asking for help for problems with their mental health is a sign of weakness but it’s not. The first step of asking for help is not easy to do and facing up to issues you may have buried long ago can be difficult. So when you need counselling it’s a sign that you are strong and you want to improve your life.
If you broke your leg, you wouldn’t let it heal itself saying plaster casts were only for the weak, would you? It’s the same with your brain. Sometimes it doesn’t work the way it should and hampers your life without you knowing the reason why. Finding out why can improve your life immensely.
It’s important to point out that counselling isn’t for everyone.
If you have either a diagnosed or undiagnosed personality disorder, or it’s too close to the event which has caused the problems it may not be useful to you. Sometimes people do the process in little steps – having a small amount of counselling at different times.
Counselling will help you to develop new tools to live your life, and some people like to get stop counselling and use those tools then come back when they reach another sticking point.
Sometimes, the type of counselling a counsellor does may not be right for you. If you feel the counsellor doesn’t seem to be on your wavelength, or is too challenging or not challenging enough then you may benefit from seeing someone new.
At NECS we know how important getting the right counsellor is.
We always carry out a consultation session first of all. We talk to you about what is going on for you, what outcome you would like and find out about your personality. During that session, we would tell you if counselling didn’t seem right for you, or if there was someone else who would be better to help you. If counselling is right for you, we select a counsellor from our pool of 50 counsellors who might be best suited to you.
Once counselling starts, you would see the same counsellor until your work was complete. We can work with you as long as you need to see a counsellor. Everything discussed in the room is confidential between the counsellor and you.
Counsellors do discuss cases with their supervisors to help them develop their clinical practice, but they never talk about their clients by name. We don’t keep records which can be identified. The only time we would ever break confidentiality is if we thought there would be a risk of harm to you or someone else. We would always discuss this with your prior to making the disclosure.
So, if you have something that has been niggling at you and affecting your life then perhaps you need counselling.